Friday, March 03, 2006

Blogging Blues

In a fit of over-indulgence I've wasted my week off of med school blogging. Yup, pretty much all of it. Oh, it hasn't been only gay mormon blogs. It's been family, hobby, religion AND gay mormon blogs. And a lot of the time has been spent trying to figure out just how to do stuff. How to post, how to comment, how to throw in the judicious html every once in a while. But today I tried to use a newsreader to add all my new blog friends to an RSS and/or atom feed. Okay, maybe I bit off a bit more than I can chew. I think it will be handy when I figure it out though.

But now that I'm getting the hang of it, I have to re-assess why I'm blogging at all. Sure, it's a nice diversion, but I've found that I get wrapped up in it too easily. I've tried to comment when I have something to say, but not too frequently. I've tried to chime in on discussions when they are interesting, but I don't want to be too critical of others' thoughts. I want to be insightful and exercise my writing skills, but I also want to feel comfortable leaving a one-liner comment about nothing in particular. I'm just too dang wussy for blogging!

But even more of a problem than that--I'm an approval whore and I want to solve everyone else's problems! I think if I can just comment enough, write enough, think enough, I can single-handedly be a therapist for billions of internet users. And I don't even have my own high-speed connection (thanks, anonymous wireless neighbor). Maybe I'll just back the Internet up on to my flash drive for later perusal.

The other problem is that I fully anticipate getting sick of this and moving on at some indeterminate point in the future. Hopefully I will have gotten out everything I wanted to say on this blog as an effort to gain further insight for myself. But, it kind of makes me want to just skip the whole thing. I can't go and get attached to you all! The Internet makes for fickle friends. You'll probably all go and break my heart. And when life gets busier, I just can't imagine it going another way. But for now, thanks for being my new blog friends.

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